TOP GUN
"The Top Gun Trophy is awarded to the Best Player on Tour in any given year, taking into consideration matches won, the quality of their golf and their ability to consume vast amounts of alcohol. Each day the leader has the honour of wearing the coveted yellow jersey with the winner crowned on Sunday afternoon."
- Year: 2010
- Venue: Porthmadog
- Top Gun: Wilma
- Quote:
PJ: Wilma, whose butt did you kiss to get in here anyway?
Wilma: The list is long, but distinguished.
PJ: Yeah, well so is my Johnson (not!)
- Year: 2009
- Venue: Trevose
- Winner: Jonesey
- Quote:
Dalesy: I played golf with your old man back in Chantilly 2001. You’re a lot like he was. Only better and worse. He was a natural heroic son of bitch that one.What I’m going to tell you is classified. It could end my GBH career. We were in the worst fourball I ever dreamed of. There were bogeys like fireflies all over the course. His F-4 driver was shit but he could have made a game of it with the 3 wood. In the end he made 3 great putts before he bought it.
- Year: 2008
- Venue: Valencia
- Top Gun: Timmy G
- Quote:
JR: You two really are cowBOYS.
Timmy G: What's your problem, JR?
JR: You're everyone's problem. That's because every time you go on the tee you're unsafe. I don't like you because you're dangerous.
Timmy G: That's right! JR.... I am dangerous.
- Year: 2007
- Venue: Vilamoura
- Winner: Jonesey
- Quote:
Jezza: Don't screw around with me Jonesey. You're a hell of an instinctive golfer. Maybe too good. I'd like to bust your butt but I can't. I got another problem here. I gotta send somebody from this society to Vilamoura. I gotta do something here, I still can believe it. I gotta give you your dream shot! I'm gonna send you up against the best. You Jonesey are going to Top Gun.
- Year: 2006
- Venue: Nairn
- Top Gun: Jezza
- Quote:
Phelpsy: In case some of you are wondering who the best is they are up here on this plaque
Phelpsy:(turns to Jezza) Do you think your name will be on that plaque?
Jezza: Yes sir
Phelpsy: That's pretty arrogant, considering the company you're in
Jezza:Yes sir
Phelpsy: I like that in a Gent
- Year: 2005
- Venue: Zell Am See
- Winner: JM
- Quote:
"How does it feel to be on the front page of every newspaper in the english speaking world, even though the Boys deny the victory? Congratulations."
- Year: 2004
- Venue: Bournemouth
- Top Gun: Sinners
- Quote:
"Its the bottom of the 9th, the scores are tied its time for the big one. You up for it Sinners? Just a walk in the park Jonesey."
- Year: 2003
- Venue: Waterloo
- Winner: Jonesey
- Quote:
Grimer: Good Morning gentleman. The temperature is 110 degrees.
Sinners: Holy shit, it's Grimer! Bruce "the Goose"
Spencer: Grimer's up here, great... oh shit...
Sinners: Great, he's probably saying, "Holy shit, it's Sinners and Bruce."
Bruce: Yeah, I'm sure he's saying that.